Some people have an idea of what they want to happen at their funeral or memorial service. If you do have things you want to happen, it is vital that you let those who are in charge of your final arrangements know about those wishes. One way to do that is through proper estate planning. While many people think they have time to make those decisions, that isn't always the case. A recent story about a transgender female highlights the issue of making your wishes known.

In this case, the person was born as a male. Several years ago, the person opted to live full time as a woman. He had his name legally changed to a female's name. Sadly, the person suffered an aneurysm at the age of 32. She was at work when the aneurysm took her life.

Her father made her funeral arrangements. He had her long hair cut short and had her presented in an open casket as a male. Her obituary was written as if she wasn't living a transgender life. She was referred to as a male in the obituary.

Friends of the deceased woman say her father denied her identity. She had been raised by her mother's parents. A friend says that the father may have acted out of ignorance or arrogance but that she didn't know what the parent was going through.

As we have said many times, it is vital that you put your final wishes in writing so heirs, beneficiaries and survivors know what you want. While this woman had her name legally changed, she was still listed as a male on her death certificate and was presented as a male at her funeral. Putting your wishes in writing in accordance with Florida law is one way you can help to ensure your final wishes will be honored.

Source: Miami Herald, “Transgender woman dies suddenly, presented at funeral in open casket as a man” Steve Rothaus, Nov. 21, 2014